gimme that old time religion
Friday, June 27, 2008
Martin Luther created a new church with "95 Thesis". Al Gore created one with one movie. Algoreinism with its millions of algorean acolytes is as much a belief system as any religion. It brooks no dissent and demands blind belief from its followers. Its tenant is that global warming is occuring and that man is the cause. While evidence is fairly convincing that global warming is occuring ( in spite of the fact that global temperatures have not moved up for ten years ). It is less certain that carbon dioxide is the cause of any increase. Carbon dioxide has increased over last ten years so the correlation has been weakend. Inconvenient facts have not raised doubts among the true believers in the press or among the public. This church has immense political clout so let us examine its commandments.
1. Thou shall not doubt that global warming is occuring and will remain blind to any evidence to the contrary.
2. Thou art the cause of climate change through use of carbon based fuels.
3. Thou shall preserve the earth for thy progeny even if they have to go hungry and cold
4. Thou shall not question the preservation of areas which only the elite of the church will be able to enjoy.
5. Thou shall keep unbelievers fearful and insist that only through Algorenism can they be saved
6 Thou shall tithe to the Sierra Club , PETA , Friends of the Earth and all other organizations supporting the church so that the selfless acolytes who run these organizations will be well paid.
7.Thou shall stretch facts in order to further the interests of the church and raise money.
8.Thou shall demean any scientists who questions the beliefs of the church as a tool of vicious oil compnanies or other capitalistic despoilers of the environment.
9. Thou shall hold hikers , backpackers, in higher esteem than skiers mountain bikers, horseback riders, the handicapped and other despoilers of the pristine wilderness.
10. Thou shall celebrate the name of our founder, Algore and hold all of his edicts as gospel , as he is infallable in matters of faith.
Martin Luther created a new church with "95 Thesis". Al Gore created one with one movie. Algoreinism with its millions of algorean acolytes is as much a belief system as any religion. It brooks no dissent and demands blind belief from its followers. Its tenant is that global warming is occuring and that man is the cause. While evidence is fairly convincing that global warming is occuring ( in spite of the fact that global temperatures have not moved up for ten years ). It is less certain that carbon dioxide is the cause of any increase. Carbon dioxide has increased over last ten years so the correlation has been weakend. Inconvenient facts have not raised doubts among the true believers in the press or among the public. This church has immense political clout so let us examine its commandments.
1. Thou shall not doubt that global warming is occuring and will remain blind to any evidence to the contrary.
2. Thou art the cause of climate change through use of carbon based fuels.
3. Thou shall preserve the earth for thy progeny even if they have to go hungry and cold
4. Thou shall not question the preservation of areas which only the elite of the church will be able to enjoy.
5. Thou shall keep unbelievers fearful and insist that only through Algorenism can they be saved
6 Thou shall tithe to the Sierra Club , PETA , Friends of the Earth and all other organizations supporting the church so that the selfless acolytes who run these organizations will be well paid.
7.Thou shall stretch facts in order to further the interests of the church and raise money.
8.Thou shall demean any scientists who questions the beliefs of the church as a tool of vicious oil compnanies or other capitalistic despoilers of the environment.
9. Thou shall hold hikers , backpackers, in higher esteem than skiers mountain bikers, horseback riders, the handicapped and other despoilers of the pristine wilderness.
10. Thou shall celebrate the name of our founder, Algore and hold all of his edicts as gospel , as he is infallable in matters of faith.